Axl Sinatra Wins “ER Patient of the Year” for 3rd Consecutive Year
Boasting a number of concussions that would shock even an NFL widow, Axl Sinatra was once again voted “ER Patient of the Year.”
According to Sinatra, he was nominated for the award by “Whatever Hospital” in “Whatever city this is.” He then asked what day it was and walked into a neighborhood Denny’s where he ordered his meal using only Bon Jovi lyrics. Bystanders overheard him melodically asking a waitress to, “Lay pancakes on me” and at one point he reportedly stood up suddenly, pointed, and shouted, “You give coffee a bad name!” before sitting down and finishing his plate of sausage links. That was all he reportedly ordered. Just an entire plate of sausage links.
We spoke with hair metal expert Dr. Roxo at Whatever Hospital, and he said “All I friggin’ know dude is Axl’s brain looks worse than mine,” then Dr. Roxo discreetly wiped some cocaine off of his nose, before doing more cocaine… right in front of us… during the interview… In front of some of his other hair metal patients. When questioned about his medical credentials he said, “All doctors at Whatever Hospital just go to Whatever Medical School where they are given Whatever Degree, man.”
As we left Whatever Hospital they were blaring Red Hot by Motley Crue over the distorted hospital PA system. We applaud Axl on his award and also on choosing the most rock and roll hospital of all time.
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Where was I when all this was taking place – Axl
If I remember correctly, you were being sued by most of the ER nurses for sexual harassment.